Magazine:

Welcome to the Third Annual Blinky Awards!

The Comic Book Guy is sitting alone at his counter in the Android's Dungeon watching the Blinky Awards on a portable TV. Suddenly, he grunts and his posture tightens. He starts to gasp for breath, and grips his chest.

CBG

Comic Book GuyComic Book Guy: "Great Kirby's Ghost! A heart attack! AGAIN?!"

He collapses on the floor.

Soon Comic Book Guy awakens to the smell of sulfur and fire. He looks around to see that he is in Hell. Stalagmites and boiling seas of lava surround it. Screams of horror can be heard in the background.

Comic Book GuyComic Book Guy: (Unimpressed) "Pfft. What a cliche."

A swirl of flames appears before him, slowly changing into the form of a human. In a puff of smoke the flames disappear and we see Devil Flanders.

CBG in Hell

Devil FlandersDevil Flanders: "Wel-didily-elcome to your eternal darn-didily-doodily-damnation, condemned-areeno!"

Comic Book GuyComic Book Guy: "Ned Flanders!? I should have seen that coming. Tell me, why have I been sent here?"

Devil FlandersDevil Flanders: "Comic Book Guy, you have been sentenced to Heck for crimes against humanity."

Comic Book GuyComic Book Guy: "You don't mean living out my Planet Risa fantasies with Skinner's elderly mother do you?"

Devil FlandersDevil Flanders: (Shudders) "No! Grotesque as that may be, I speak of something much worse. COMIC BOOK GUY, you are here for scalping action figures and selling them at a markup of 500%!"

Comic Book GuyComic Book Guy: "Give me a break. That's worthy of Hellfire? It's not my fault. Blame the people stupid enough to pay my prices."

Devil Flanders growls with anger and transforms into a hideous, 20-foot tall demonic beast.

Devil FlandersDevil Flanders: "DARE YOU MOCK MY JUDGMENT!?! I DICTATE WHAT'S WORTHY OF DAMNATION OR NOT (well, God and I), AND NOW YOU MUST SUFFER AN ETERNITY OF APPROPRIATELY IRONIC AND HILARIOUS PUNISHMENTS!!!"

Comic Book Guy looks disinterested and yawns. A depressed look falls over Devil Flanders' face and he transform back to normal.

Devil FlandersDevil Flanders: "Why aren't you frightened? Your pants should be soaking wet by now."

Comic Book GuyComic Book Guy: "Oh please, I saw the Balrog in 'Lord of the Rings' last year. I'm not scared."

Devil FlandersDevil Flanders: "Well then, I guess I'll have to devise a torture that will convince you of my powers. You are hereby sentenced to watch the 'Star Wars Holiday Special' back to back with the 'Fantastic Four' over and over again! BWAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAA!-diddily"

Comic Book GuyComic Book Guy: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

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